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Someone is waiting to LOVE YOU...
My name is Trixa, a woman from Britain, and I had made an earlier entry in Kerala Erotica about my stay in Kerala during December - January 2006/2007. That happened in the city of Cochin, where I had a wonderful relationship with Ameena, a girl at a phone booth. That had removed most of my scare for any kind of sex other than masturbation.
You see, I had some bad sex experience when I was in young and later when I was married. My husband was a burly Yorkshire man who loved to abuse me. Sex to him should begin by stripping me and pinching me. He was a sadist, but it took some time for me to divorce him.
When I came to India, my heart and my body full of pain. I came also to meet my cousin, Hannah, who is staying in an ashram near Trivandrum, the capital of Kerala. An ashram, by way of explanation to my non-Indian friends, is an hermitage, where under a guru, a lot of acolytes stay. Hannah’s guru too was a woman. Hannah knew about my messy divorce. She asked me too come and stay with her in her ashram.
I took a car from trivandrum airport and went to this place, her ashram, on the slope of a mountain. There were about a 20 huts there with a main hut where guru matha (holy mother) stayed and where they have daily meetings in a hall. Hannah or Kamlamayee as she is called stayed with a belgian girl. I was given a hut that I shared with Ammini Amma (Aunt Ammini – AA for short.) a lady of 55 years. She was a rich widow from calicut, in northern Kerala. Cheerful Ammini, was seen all the time praying. She left me alone.
Hannah asked me whether wounds of my divorce have healed. I said still I dread about man-woman sex. She said, “you need someone to worship your sacred temple.”
“Sacred temple?”
Hannah said, “ Your vagina. Or Yoni, the Sanskrit word for the vagina, can be translated as "sacred space" or "Sacred Temple. In Tantra, the yoni is is to be worshipped.”
“What shall I do with my yoni?” I asked.
“Get it worshipped. Get a yoni massage.”
“A what? A yoni massage?”
“It is a tantric ritual, an offering of love and trust to your vagina. It removes childhood and marital scars of sexual abuse. I recommend it.”
“Ok, who will give me yoni massage? You?”
“No,” said Hannah, also known as, Kamlamayee. “Ammini Amma is an excellent tantric teacher. Besides she speaks english. Shall I ask her?
“ Ammini Amma? That old room mate of mine? Is she a lesbian?”
‘No,” hannah said, “She is a great tantric massuer.”
So my yoni massage was fixed for the next full moon day, that came two days later.
Now something about yoni massage: Before beginning the massage, AA (Ammini Amma ) said that it is important to make my room and bed absolutely relaxing. She put jasmine flowers and lighted jos sticks. She also played light soul music. The ambience was such that I can enter a state of high arousal and experience greatest pleasure from my yoni. AA’s reward, she told me was that she would experience the joy of giving maximum pleasure and witnessing a special tantric moment.
But the massage is not for orgasm alone; although orgasm is often a pleasant and welcome side effect. When orgasm does occur it would last longer, more intense and more satisfying.
“What would you get, Ammini? “ I asked.
“I expect anything in return, but simply allow you or the to enjoy the massage and to relax into yourself.
At about 9 pm of the full moon night, after all residents of the ashram had gone to sleep, AA or Ammini Amma asked me to take bath and come out of the bath room, covering a towel. I did what she asked me. As soon as I reached the fragrant massage room, she took off my towel. She sprayed indian perfume. She lighted a kerala brass lamp and switched off the light. Music was already playing.
“Ammini, you are not stripping?” I asked.
AA said: “No, from now on no more talking.”
She made me lie on my back with pillows under my head so that I can look down at my pussy and also look up at Ammini. AA placed a pillow under my hips. My legs were spread apart with the knees slightly bent and my genitals clearly exposed for Ammini’s massage. This position, I realised, allowed Ammini full access to my yoni and anus.
Before touching me AA said: “Let’s begin with deep, relaxed breathing.”
Ammini started gently massaging my legs, abdomen, thighs, breasts, etc., mainly to encourage me to relax. Ammini, when she was sure that I was not tense, started gently massaging the mound and outer lips of my pussy. She spent a lot of time there and was not in any hurry.
Then Ammini gently squeezed the outer lip of my yoni, with her thumb and index finger. She started sliding up and down the entire length of my left and right yoni lips. She did the same to the inner lips of my, by now fully wet, vagina. She took her time. I was moaning slowly, but AA only smiled at me, and all the time looking lovingly at my eyes.
Ammini slowly moved her index finger to my clitoris. She stroked my clitoris with clockwise and counter-clockwise finger movements. She then gently squeezed it between thumb and index fingers. She was not trying to make me aroused, but that was a part of massaging.But I was very aroused and crying out and panting. Ammini said: “Trixa, relax and breathe deeply.”
Then slowly and with great care, AA inserted the middle finger of her right hand into my yoni hole. She very gently explored and massaged the inside of my cunt with that finger. She was very patient, felt me up, down and sideways. Sometimes her finger went very deep, she varied speed and pressure. It was driving me crazy, but to AA it was just giving a massage, in which she was nurturing and relaxing my yoni.
Suddenly her finger contacted a spongy area of tissue just under the pubic bone, behind the clitoris, my G-spot. My god, that was pleasure beyond words, I felt like exploding. AA cooly varied the pressure, speed and pattern of movements. She moved side to side, back and forth, or in circles with her middle finger.
Slowly the thumb of her right hand started to stimulate my clitoris as well. This was driving me up the wall with pleasure. My moans and cries shattered the peace and serenetity of the ashram. I could care less. I was going to have a big orgasm.
I could feel AA’s little finger circling my anus. She inserted the pinky of the right hand into my anus. Ahh.. I had a giant orgasm.
Then one after another, I came three times, each stronger than the other. In one of them I grabbed AA and brought her face to my face for a kiss. She gently removed my hand and said “Relax and enjoy the massage.”
She then used her left hand to massage my breasts, abdomen, and clitoris. She massaged the clitoris by using the thumb in an up down motion, with the rest of the hand resting on, and massaging the mound. The dual stimulation of right and left hands provided me with much pleasure.I came once again and then.. started sobbing. Many powerful emotions came up and I went on crying. In the end I said: “Thank you Ammini, I was sexually abused in my marriage and now I feel that I am healed.”
She ended the massage by gently removing her finger. She bowed her head and said “Namastey.”
Write to me at trixa@mail.com
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